Kelina|Mare|War Mare

[kelina]

Character Name: Kelina
Pronounced: Kel-E-na
Gender: Mare
Age: four years
Rank: War Mare
Other Characters: n/a

Appearance: A dark bay color consumes most of the mare’s make-up. A single dull snip and stripe adorn her facial features with light brown eyes. Her mane and tail are a simple black in color that matches her four darker/black socks.

Standing at sixteen hands high, it compliments her bulkier build. This meaning while her speed and agility might not be as good as others, her strength and power characteristics are more enhanced. Stamina is something for individuals to make for themselves which for her is rather developed.

Probably something not unusual for a War Mare is a scar or two. Her hind quarters are covered with scars from many brawls and the fight with her father. From the top and sides of her rump down to her back legs is covered with multiple scars- make of it what you will. The middle of her neck has its fair share of scars too, but not as many as her hind portion.

Personality:
Disciplined- Despite a War Horse’s tendency to strike at another horse, Kelina may not strike right away or feel the need or necessity to fight like her counter parts of War Horse blood.
Mature- Kelina is not a giddy, two-year-old filly who chases butterflies in the meadow. Sure she can become a spitfire, but she just does not ‘frolic in the meadows’ and mostly does the things she does because of necessity.
Spitfire- On occasion the need to fight in her blood will come out as a need to fight verbally. Some days she can win and others she digs herself a hole with her words.
Intellectual- Even though she can have her tantrums, she still has to be smart in order to plan things such as attacks.

Rp Sample:

Snorting, the mare pawed the muddy earth below her as the sun played peek-a-boo from behind the clouds. An overcast day had given her coat a muddy and drenched look. It was not clean and slick from the rain as if she took a bath, no… she had insisted on running through the mud. However, the rain had picked up and she did not feel like trudging through the woods while water pelted her eyes and obscured visibility. It would not be wise to run into a tree now, eh? Finding a type of natural structure, she waited for lighter rain. The ears crowning her head twitched at the sudden cry of a newly killed animal. ‘Predator,’ her mind said, but she was not in any sense prey to be killed.

The steady downpour of rain had soon slowed to a slow drizzle as the gray clouds let up. Deciding to get on with her lousy day, she made her way farther towards the grasslands. It was not a very attractive sight though to see a mud-covered form cantering through the sodden earth a mess. Flying projectiles of rock and mud flew up behind her in her wake. Not intending to seek solitude, but something more interesting than hiding in the woods, the mare moved her way towards a meadow of sorts by following the trail of disappearing trees.

The clearing of trees brought an almost sigh of relief from the bulky, mud-covered, mass as its body made its way further into the open land. Even after the rain the grazing material known as grass was sweet to the tongue. Better yet, after she had hardly eaten anything the day before this was just so good to the tongue and edible. Nevertheless, it would be stupid not to take up the opportunity to replenish energy. Yet while this glorious opportunity was available, it opened up for any type of attack.

Not wanting to be caught unaware, the mare picked up a habit similar to that of a deer's. She would drag up grass, lift up her head, chew, and scan the area with ears moving constantly, and then repeat the process. Occasionally nostrils would flare widely to try and drain out scents. Losers... A simple word stood out among her thoughts. Any horse to pass up an opportunity to re-fuel was stupid. To be able to fight you needed the energy and that came from eating. An unsettling feeling began creeping up on the mass of flesh as the sun began to hide behind a cloud again. Glancing towards the sky, the scent of rain was not too far off. Looking towards the woods she had came from, she studied it harshly. Something was off.


Other:
Some history: Hm yes, not much to say. It’s behind her now. Her mother was a worthless dog who didn’t stand up at all. However, she was rather intelligent and living with her mother had allowed a small bond to form between them. It was mutual respect. Vasyl (Kelina’s sire) on the other hand, he was stern and harsh, letting the others beat on her when she was younger and thought it good. It would ‘toughen’ her up. Well daddy-o, you got it. At one point, Vasyl took a chance and struck out at her, trying to reprimand her. However, Kelina seemed to get lucky (as she was not killed) when she struck back at her father which would later end up as a blown-out fight. The results- what is seen on her body. Nevertheless, she struck a blow and her father misjudged the time of his dodge. Her hind legs struck him with a blow that caught him off guard and aided to her escape. The wound she had caused later filled with infection and the tissue swelled and he died of seemingly internal bleeding and suffocation- caused of course by his daughter.

[`` OWNER]

Pending.

5 is old for a War Horse, please change your characters age to 4.

A single dull snip and strip

I'm assuming that was supposed to be 'stripe?'

with her seem to be at a time-still where her thoughts are neutral

That sentences is very confusing. Please re-read over it and edit it, or otherwise explain to me what you meant.

She is not stupid as some view her to be when she does not directly strike out first to another, but rather mature

Rather your character is mature, or you'd rather others view her as mature? Another confusing sentence.

Rather or not she

Should be 'Whether' not rather.

I'm not so sure about her history. I've seen a lot of applications in the past where mares killed their father or mother or brother or some dark, evil creature. I like how you phrased it in that she was lucky and did not escape without a few scars herself, but the history is very cliche and realistically I don't see a horse 'accidentally' striking another in the jugular. As this site is not entirely based on reality, I can over look that, but I'm still not sure about her history otherwise.

You also have a lot of spelling and grammar mistakes. Please re-read your application (works better if you do it out loud) and just clean it up a bit.

[kelina]

modified

[`` OWNER]

Pending.

Everything is much better now (loved the part about her 'frolicking' and what not <3) but her history is still getting to me. Mayhaps we can compromise and have that the wound that your character inflicted on her father did not do harm to the jugular, but got infected and in turn caused the swelling etc. and he died?

[kelina]

-shrugs- Does that work or still no good? =/

[`` OWNER]

Accepted.

<3 Thank you for your understanding and patience. Welcome to Cappadocia.